When life throws you lemons, you make lemonade right? Well, I’ve been given an opportunity to work, to challenge everything I’ve found comfortable and separate myself from all the people who have played important parts in my life. This is a job that takes place in an office an entire ocean and two flights away. That’s right, I’m packing my bags and going back to Thailand but this time equipped with a work permit and not the “eat, sleep, party & repeat” mindset.
Why have I not freaked out?
1. Reality hasn’t kicked in yet
My suitcases are half empty and I have a little under 14 days to pack my life into a check-in. There’s still a driving test and my mother’s birthday to worry about before paperwork comes in and the flight has been booked.
2. I’m still relatively young
Even if this turns out to be a crazy terrible mistake and I end up hitching it back to North America, I’ll still be considerably young when I return. And honestly, who really ever regrets traveling? New experiences are something I’ve always chased after and it won’t be much different this time around.
3. I’ve been to South East Asia before
My stomach can handle street food, I’ve already been vaccinated and I only lost around $0.20 during my two months of travel. I would say that’s pretty good for a first timer.
Why anxiety levels are off the charts (and showing on my face)?
1. Business isn’t my forte
As a (near) future Content Specialist for a start-up, chances are I will be doing everything and anything under the hot blazing sun that beats on Thailand. People around me say I’ll be fine but I don’t want to be just fine, I want to be great and prove that sending me across seas wasn’t a waste of their time and money.
2. The thought of home sickness already sucks
I recently came back from a mini-getaway with my gal pals and the thought of not seeing them or my family for a while made me feel uncomfortably queasy. I’m not the most emotional person but even something like this can evoke a pretty strong feeling. No more Netflix dates with my bae (the last time I will ever use this word I swear), no more chilly winters (never got a chance to wear my new jacket) and I’ll even miss bickering with my mom over not wearing my slippers in the house.
3. I’m stepping into the unknown
I’m ready to grow, to push myself further than I have ever and learn to be a bit more selfish. I’m definitely scared but fear is good. This opportunity is for me to create something of value that I can look back on and feel pride. I can’t be stuck in my safe bubble at home forever.
When life throws you lemons, you try your hardest to make a great spankin’ juice and if it doesn’t fancy your taste, there will always be a next time. There isn’t only trajectory in life, sometimes you have to go with the flow.
Updates soon! Wishing everyone a great first month of the year,