Let’s set the world on fire.

i do not want to have you
to fill the empty parts of me
i want to be full on my own

i want to be so complete
i could light up a whole city
and then
i want to have you
cause the two of
us combined
could set it
on fire

rupi kaur

Advertisements

A Letter to My Thirty Something Self

Dear thirty year old self,

I have no idea where you may be in life at this moment – both geologically and career wise – but I know you have found success by your own definition.

There may or may not be a man in your life but I know you aren’t bothered because you have your family, friends and weird self to keep you company.

Remember to treasure the people that genuinely care about you by asking how they are, calling them often and showing them you appreciate them. Never feel bad for saying ‘no’ more often – your time is yours to spend.

If you do have a partner, don’t take him for granted and do not forget to tell him that you love him even if it makes you uncomfortable (they need the reassurance from time to time and so do you, even if you are stubbornly going to deny it).

If there isn’t something special baking in the oven, you’re not obliged to satisfy your biological clock. Go at your own pace, things only get better with a little more time, *insert pop of wine bottle cork*.

With age comes experience and that is the source of wisdom, so embrace the growth and don’t forget to apply sunscreen!

There will be times when you feel completely lost, hate the world and want to escape under your covers and never come out but know that it can only get better if you try. You aren’t meant to have all the answers in life. No matter what you have encountered, I hope you continue to keep your head high and finally build something that gives back to the community in a big way.

Please always remember:

“It is what you can summon up from within that will distinguish you” – Vera Wang

Love always,

Me

PS – I hope you’ve learned how to properly cook a dish at this point in life. xo

Gradual steps.

A few things have happened in the last few months since my last post.

I survived a sweaty uphill 4 km hike and slept with spiders the size of my palm. I swam under waterfalls and got dragged around in a moving house. I ‘glamped’ out at a riverside camp and rode the local train for 3 hours while savouring my chocolate ice cream.

Sukkothai-eyesupco-2

I travelled back home to Canada to see my friends, my family and wandered familiar streets.

I watched my team get bigger and then smaller and soon to be bigger once more after countless interviews. Oh, and I moved to a ‘big girl’ one bedroom apartment.

You know the expression, it’s funny how life changes so quickly? Well, instead of laughing, I’m finding room for adjustments.

When I first moved to Bangkok two and a half years ago, I was a fresh sap looking to plant some roots in whatever affordable housing I could find close to the office – I lived in three studio rooms in total.

I was feverishly eager and aggressive in my learning – so much so that a wise one told me that I needed to ‘slow down’.

It was good advice. I focused on accomplishing whatever tasks I had at hand and worried less about the future, hell, that was tough. And as the pile of successfully completed projects grew, so did my responsibilities and my role at the company.

That’s how life is. It’s a spiralling staircase you must ascend to reach each floor that holds the fruits of your labor. Whether this be a new car, a nicer meal out or a trip abroad with friends, you’ll be rewarded for your efforts.

No, you can’t simply be greedy and jump from floor to floor because it’s not sustainable. How long would you be able to keep that up until you burnt out?

Things develop gradually over time, be patient and learn to enjoy the climb.

Reality check.

The Myth

There are people who are successful professionally while managing a food blog, volunteering at the animal shelter, and mastering ballroom dance. Assume you are not one of those people. Balance, in my view, is largely a myth when establishing your career. The slope of the trajectory for your career is (unfairly) set the first five years post-graduation. If you want the trajectory to be steep, you’ll need to burn a lot of fuel. The world is not yours for the taking, but for the trying.

Try hard, really hard.

I have a lot of balance now. It’s a function of the lack thereof in my twenties and thirties. Other than business school, from 22 to 34, I remember work and not much else. The world does not belong to the big, but to the fast. You want to cover more ground in less time than your peers. This is partially talent, but mostly endurance. My lack of balance as a young professional cost me my marriage, my hair, and arguably my twenties. And it was worth it.

Continue reading “Reality check.”

Lessons from you.

Bubi,

It’s normal to be scared. You are going through a phase of your life where you start making decisions with an impact on yourself and the people around you autonomously.

This little monster is called adulthood and even though I am never going to admit it even when I will be 50, both of us are adults.

At the beginning it’s scary but later will become more and more normal and the choices we will make will be even bigger and more impactful.

Also with time passing, you are going to build your certainties and the foundation for future decisions. You are going to be more aware about what you want, you are going to have more clarity on your objectives and on the people surrounding you in your life.

It’s ok to be sad, but don’t let sadness take away from you the moments you spend with the people you love, live those to the fullest and enjoy them as much as it’s possible.

Bacini